ADVERSITY QUOTIENT

Learn from Vincent Billy's case, I found a good article for parents

Vincent Billy was a bright and smart kid that committed suicide when he failed on his final project in university

PARENTING STUDY
by. Mrs Elly Risman
(Senior Psychologist and Consultant, University of Indonesia)

We never know...
what kind of the world that our children will face in the future, then teach and train them to solve their own problem now

Do not pray all roles for them...
. mother
. chef
. dishwasher

. father
. driver
. plumber

You are NOT a member of RESCUE TEAM!
Your children are not in danger
NO S.O.S signal
Do not always force yourselves to help and fix everything

#Children complain the toy puzzle cannot connected each other..."Let me help"
#The water bottle a little difficult to open "Come...Mommy do"
#Shoelace hard to tied "Here...Daddy tie for you"
#Oil sprinkled on that little hand "Come...Mommy wipe"

What will your children be?!

If help provided out of the storm
What happens when disaster really come?

Give the children opportunity to find their OWN solution before jump in and help them
#1 The ability to handle stress
#2 Solve the problem
#3 Find the Solution
...are the skilled that must be trained and learned by the children
...those skills are not just happened without any training

The ability to solve problems and survive in trouble times without giving up could have an impact for decades to come

Not only can make a person graduate from school
but also passed the test of the storm trough life and marriage

It is seems not important...
"what's wrong with helping my children?!"

If you immediately rush to save them from all the difficulties
They would become FRAGILE and WITHER

Hurt little bit, complain!
Fight a bit, as for a divorce!
Facing small problem, gone crazy!

IF you spend lots of time paying attention and money for their IQ
THEN put the same effort for their AQ

AQ?
What is AQ?

ADVERSITY QUOTIENT

According to Paul G. Stoltz
AQ is the intelligence in his face difficulties or obstacles and the ability to survive in a variety of life's difficulties and challenges experienced. 

Would this intelligence more important than IQ to face daily problems?

the feeling of being able to passed the test is a an incredible pleasure
being able to solve the problem, ranging from simple to difficult will give confident to the children and make them believe that asking for help is the last option when things really out of their hands

so...

LET your children go through difficulties in life

NO problem if child suffered from minor cuts,
a little cry
a little disappointment
a little bit late
get wet by the rain

HOLD your tongue, hands and heart from providing assistance
Teach them to HANDLE the frustration


If you are always a fairy godmother or guardian angel.
What happens if you are no longer breath again tomorrow?

your kids may follow you to the grave

It is hard not to intervene when looking at your own child in pain, grief and struggle
Moreover as parent, the first instinct is to protect our children
So train the children's AQ is a test for parents as well

But...please understand...
Life is not easy, the problem will always be there and they must be able to survive
Many times we cannot avoid passing through the rain, storm and difficulties in life

Your action now gives them future!